Myths

Visiting my sister has been long overdue. It was good to see her. She looked good. Happy. Carrying this large book in her arms she plopped it on the seat next to me, "Look up your birthday. This book is amazing."
"What?" I replied. I stared at the image across it and knew within moments what was before me. It was an astrology book. For a brief period of my former life I did dabble in making astrological charts for people. Making those charts helped me realize how truly general and sensational astrology was. "No thanks, Sis" I responded handing her the book. I could read May 25th or September 17th and still find something that related to me.
"Sash," that's my family nickname, " Don't be such a dork. Just read it." So I flipped it over to my page. My sister grabbed the book and started reading on my behalf.
"This is so you," she said, "You love to write. You're creative. And independent?" I caught her pause, "Hmmm... well, maybe BEFORE you got married."
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked. She didn't respond but I knew.
Homemakers aren't seen as independent, or strong, or self-sufficient, or anything other than some weak, mild mannered bread baking homely pilgrim farmers wife doting on her ungrateful husband and raising his brood of unintelligent, sarcastic kids.
Awhile ago, Todd Friel of Wretched radio brought a guest on his show: Suzanne Venker. She is the author of Seven Myths of Working Mothers. You can find her book here: http://suzannevenker.com/content/book.asp?id=Description
During the interview she spoke of the flawed viewpoint much of modern day society has on the role of the homemaker. One was that men have it all. "Why can't women have it all?" These people say. Ha. Like some thief came in and robbed us of all independence when we chose to stay home and raise our kids.
What I want to know is HOW do men have it all? Think about it. I honestly have the greatest job. I really do. I work for and with a house full of people who love me. My husband is a respected contributor of his company. However, if he screwed up on a marketing presentation he had to conduct in front of the president of said company I highly doubt his boss would squeeze his shoulder and tell him, "That's okay Buddy. Better luck next time."
My consequences are not as great solely because I am loved. "That's okay if you burned dinner mommy/ Honey. Sandwiches are a great second choice."
Also, men don't get to spend as much time with their children as women do. They are off working in the world, paying the bills, stressing over issues related to work then coming home and dealing with the issues presented there. I manage one team: my home. My husband manages two: his work team and his home team. Would I trade places with him? Would I give up the time I am given here with our children in order to push papers for someone who could fire and rehire me in seconds? Not a chance. Sorry, men don't have it all. Women do. And for that we need to pray for our husbands. One thing my husband yearns for is his time managed in a way that he can enjoy more time with us. I don't blame him. Life is great here.
But if anyone were to think for one minute I gave up myself, any part of myself, to take on this job, they are dead wrong.
If anything, with God's help, it has only grown me in ways I never thought imaginable.

Family Dog

I am not a dog person. Not at all. I can count the number of dogs I actually care for to some degree on one hand and have three fingers left over. One of those dogs is...ahem...uh...the one we currently own. Now I know if my husband sees this he will jump in the air ecstatically. He is a dog whisperer and he loves our dog.

I just don't get it. They need constant maintenance: walks, poop clean-up, baths, and if you want to go on vacation forget it! Where are you going to put your dog?

The reason I tolerate Rosie is because she is an easy low-maintenance dog. She is great with kids. She doesn't bark ALL THE TIME, but if someone hangs too close to our house for too long she'll let out a low growl just to let them know she is there. She loves just about everyone she sees but I did personally witness her chase after a landscaper that helped himself into our backyard without asking and even our pest guy gets it unless I send him through the front door first to get the "sniff check". If she runs off and you call her she comes back. She won't even eat her food until you nod to her that it's ok.

But I feel bad for this dog because James is always at work and she is always here with me, looking at me with big ole doggie eyes wanting me to pet her or show her some kind of love and I just can't. If I get up, she gets up and follows me then lays at my feet and looks at me longingly waiting for me to love her. Urgh...so I get up again and tell her to "Stay!" And she stares at me cock-eyed then when I walk away she sneaks behind me to whatever room I am in and crawls into a dark corner where I shouldn't see her but she sees me. I have labored many babes and when I labor my dog is there..this time not at my feet but lying down watching me, making sure I am ok. I'll even yell at her and tell her to go away because she stinks! She just sulks to a farther corner and circles around a few times before settling in but she won't leave. She just watches. Why?

Why does this dog love me so much? Seriously? I don't understand how an animal can have such amazing devotion and loyalty to someone who doesn't treat her as well as someone else would.

I wonder sometimes how much Rosie would thrive in another house. She seriously would. I know plenty of people who have asked to own her at several points through our lives together. My husband and my kids vehemently say "no." So, I sigh and I throw my fist in the air and I loudly proclaim, "Lord, why?!" But I know in my heart of hearts if anything happened to this hairy smelly beast I would be heartbroken. Grrrr.....